Adams Family Correspondence, volume 1

Abigail Adams to John Adams, 29 September 1775 AA JA

1775-09-29

Abigail Adams to John Adams, 29 September 1775 Adams, Abigail Adams, John
Abigail Adams to John Adams
Dearest Friend Braintree Sepbr. 29 1775

I received your kind favour of the 17. It was a Cordial to my dejected Heart to see and hear of your safe arrival in good Health and Spirits.

Many are the Mercies of Heaven towards me. Tho I feel myself severely chastned yet I would not be unmindful either of the favours or frowns of him who hath said that he doth not afflict willingly.—Tis allotted me to go from the sick and allmost dyeing Bed of one of the Best of parents to my own habitation, where again I behold the same Scene, only varied by a remoter connextion—

“A Bitter change, severer for severe.”

I go to my Mother, and stay 12 hours with her, and then am obliged to return home to the most gastly object my Eyes ever beheld, who is continually desirous of my being with her the little While she expects to live, and who is now become such a putrid mass as scarcely to be able for any one to do their Duty towards her.

288

You can more easily conceive than I discribe what are the sensations of my Heart, when absent from either, continually expecting a Messenger with the fatal tidings; er'e this will reach you I suppose you will have received a Catalogue of my afflictions. In past years small has been my portion of the Bitter Cup in comparison with many others. But there is now prepairing for me I fear, a large draught thereof. May I be enabled to submit with patience and resignation to the rod and him who hath appointed it, knowing it is directed by unerring wisdom. The consolations of Religion are the only sure comforters in the day of affliction. They are not Buried in the dust, they journey not from us, nor can they be wrested from the mind by the lawless rapine of tyrants.

Thus far I wrote but could add no more till this morning. The Doctor is just gone, but alas he gives me no hopes, as he can see no symptoms upon which he can Build. I go to day to give a respit to my sisters.

All our dear little ones are well. Tommy looks cleverly. Patty still lives beyond any thing we could expect. Yesterday we thought her dyeing, but she revived again.

You must write me by every opportunity. You will not expect me to look abroad for any news. I hope you will have every intelegance from others much better than can be given you by your afflicted

Portia

RC (Adams Papers); addressed in an unidentified hand: “To The Honble: John Adams Esqr. at Philadelphia”; endorsed: “Portia. Septr. 29. 1775.”

Abigail Adams to John Adams, 1 October 1775 AA JA

1775-10-01

Abigail Adams to John Adams, 1 October 1775 Adams, Abigail Adams, John
Abigail Adams to John Adams
Weymouth october. 1 1775

Have pitty upon me, have pitty upon me o! thou my beloved for the Hand of God presseth me soar.

Yet will I be dumb and silent and not open my mouth becaus thou o Lord hast done it.

How can I tell you (o my bursting Heart) that my Dear Mother has Left me, this day about 5 oclock she left this world for an infinitely better.

After sustaining 16 days severe conflict nature fainted and she fell asleep. Blessed Spirit where art thou? At times I almost am ready to faint under this severe and heavy Stroke, seperated from thee who used to be a comfortar towards me in affliction, but blessed be God, 289his Ear is not heavy that he cannot hear, but he has bid us call upon him in time of Trouble.

I know you are a sincere and hearty mourner with me and will pray for me in my affliction. My poor father like a firm Believer and a Good christian sets before his children the best of Examples of patience and submission. My sisters send their Love to you and are greatly afflicted. You often Express'd your anxiety for me when you left me before, surrounded with Terrors, but my trouble then was as the small dust in the balance compaird to what I have since endured. I hope to be properly mindful of the correcting hand, that I may not be rebuked in anger.—You will pardon and forgive all my wanderings of mind. I cannot be correct.

Tis a dreadful time with this whole province. Sickness and death are in almost every family. I have no more shocking and terible Idea of any Distemper except the Plague than this.

Almighty God restrain the pestilence which walketh in darkness and wasteth at noon day and which has laid in the dust one of the dearest of parents. May the Life of the other be lengthend out to his afflicted children and Your distressd

Portia

RC (Adams Papers); addressed in an unidentified hand: “To The Honle. John Adams at Philadelphia To the Care of Col. Warren”; endorsed: “Portia Octr. 1. 1775.”