Papers of John Adams, volume 19
In response to your favor of the first of this month, I received the letters which your excellency had the goodness to write at my request and forwarded them to the president, to Mr. Fagel, and to Messrs. Willink and Staphorst. So far I have received no reply, neither to those nor to the two preceding notes I wrote to Mr. Fagel, copied here.1 I assume, however doubtfully, that these have been saved up until now from the heart of the riots which continue with impunity. Despite posters and repeated proclamations from the legislature and executive, seemingly as severe as possible, the mob is left to do what it pleases. Thus, two homes next to ours were stoned last night. At least forty more, in the past two days alone, have been as well. My turn may yet come. My poor wife and I are hardly able to contain ourselves, both of us in constant anxiety in the midst of lawlessness. Consider, sir, our dreadful state. We were unable to stay at the Hôtel de France,2 and we have been home since Saturday the 5th. The accommodations in Amsterdam are not yet ready. I await reply from thence regarding the legation, and your letters of the 5th and 20th September, of which I implicitly confirmed receipt to your excellency by confirming the date of the 21st, under which Mr. Smith forwarded them to me.3 We shall, God permitting, first take care of the absolute necessities with the utmost parsimony to make the legation comfortable and safe. Please allow, with Madam, &c., for consideration of our martyrdom. From your excellency’s most humble and most obedient servant
The state of agitation in which I write is inexpressible. I attach a deed to this letter for your excellency so that a copy may be forwarded to Congress, which I thought best to write up yesterday, and of which I have given a copy to my wife in the event that, were some mishap to befall me, my family and my goods could at the very least benefit from the protection authorized by the law of nations and the treaties. In the midst of my agitation, which is great, my reason at the very least is and shall be intact until my dying breath.